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Full Project – NEED FOR PREMARITAL COUNSELLING IN THE 21ST CENTURY

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ABSTRACT

The study examined Need for Premarital counseling in the 21st century. Premarital counseling is usually a requirement for marriage when a couple chooses to marry in a religious institution. The research method includes both library and fieldwork. Information was gathered from Books, Journals, Bible Commentaries, internet, Encyclopedia, interviews and the Dictionaries. In addition, questionnaire was administered and oral interview were conducted. The researcher therefore recommends that pastors should make the premarital counseling program compulsory for the Christians intending couples to reduce the rate of marriage divorce that is rampant in some Christian marriages today and in the society. The researcher also recommended that churches should provide a marriage committee in their churches to make necessary investigation about the intending couples before joining them together.

CHAPTER ONE

INTRODUCTION

1.1 Background to the Study

In the 21st century, the institution of marriage has undergone significant changes. With the rise of individualism and changing societal norms, couples are facing unique challenges that were not as prevalent in previous generations. This has led to an increased need for premarital counseling to address these specific issues and ensure a strong foundation for a successful marriage. Certainly! Here are three paragraphs discussing the Biblical view about marriage in the 21st century, along with Bible references.

In the 21st century, the Biblical view of marriage remains relevant and provides guidance for couples seeking to build a strong and lasting relationship. The Bible teaches that marriage is a sacred covenant between a man and a woman, designed to reflect the love and unity between Christ and the Church (Ephesians 5:22-33). It emphasizes the importance of mutual love, respect, and selflessness within the marital relationship.

Furthermore, the Bible encourages couples to prioritize their commitment to one another and to honor the marriage vows they have made. In Matthew 19:6, Jesus affirms the permanence of marriage, stating, “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.” This verse highlights the significance of marital commitment and the need for couples to work through challenges and difficulties together.

Additionally, the Bible emphasizes the importance of unity and partnership within marriage. In 1 Peter 3:7, husbands are instructed to treat their wives with understanding and honor, recognizing them as equal heirs of the grace of life. This verse highlights the need for mutual respect and support within the marital relationship, promoting a healthy and balanced partnership.

The Biblical view of marriage in the 21st century emphasizes the sacredness of the marital covenant, the importance of commitment, and the need for mutual love and respect. By following these principles, couples can build a strong foundation for their relationship and navigate the challenges of the modern world.

Marriage is noted as the oldest institution on the planet earth. It was divinely established and instituted in the Garden of Eden (Gen 2:24) by God Himself, and affirmed by Jesus to be a long life union between a man and a woman in loving companion and for the purpose of fulfilling an innate need for community and procreation. Marriage, also called matrimony or wedlock, is a socially or ritually recognized union or legal contract between spouses that establishes rights and obligations between them, and their children, and between them and their in-laws. Marriage is the union of a man and a woman who makes a permanent and exclusive commitment to each other of the type that is naturally (inherently) fulfilled by bearing and rearing children together.

Marriage is a covenant by which a man and a woman establish between themselves life partnership which nature is pioneered toward the good of the spouses, procreation and education of offspring.

Then, the purpose of marriage is unity, complimentary and oneness. Nevertheless, looking in depth to what obtains today; the researcher discovered that some of the Christian homes are presently in chaos and some at the verge of divorce while some are already experiencing divorce just because they neglected premarital counseling before entering into marriage. In addition, the researcher also noticed that 40% out of 100% of Christian marriages today collapse within three (3) or four (4) months after the wedding, which was as a result of lack of exposure to premarital counseling, that is why the majority of them find themselves in this marital conflicts. However, the remaining 60% are enjoying their marriages because of the important steps they took about premarital counseling before they entered into marriage. Onyango stated that most homes or marriages of today are far from good. Rather, they are bearable, tolerable or endurable. He observed later, that unmarried men and women are not receiving information as to what marriage is all about. He continued by saying that they entered marriage as green people without prior knowledge at all, which has always been the basis for divorce.

1.2 Statement of the Problem

Looking at what is happening in the society and in some of Christian marriages, it was discovered that some marriages have led to divorce and face numerous marital conflicts because most of the couples did not seek premarital counseling before entering into marriage. This means that the issue of premarital counseling is a phenomenon that every couple which intends to have a lasting home should not undermine because, it is important and it determines how a marriage will look like either good or bad. The researcher discovered also, that some church weddings do scatter within three or two months after wedding, resulting no or inadequate pre-marital counseling.

Certainly! Here are six paragraphs discussing the statement of the problem regarding the need for premarital counseling in the 21st century:

One of the key problems that premarital counseling aims to address is the lack of effective communication skills among couples. In today’s fast-paced world, couples often find it difficult to communicate openly and honestly with each other. Premarital counseling provides a safe space for couples to learn and practice effective communication techniques, enabling them to express their needs, concerns, and expectations in a healthy and constructive manner.

Another problem that premarital counseling seeks to tackle is the unrealistic expectations that couples often have about marriage. In the age of social media and romanticized portrayals of relationships, many individuals enter into marriage with unrealistic expectations of constant happiness and perfection. Premarital counseling helps couples to understand the realities of marriage, manage their expectations, and develop realistic goals for their relationship.

The increasing divorce rates in the 21st century also highlight the need for premarital counseling. Many couples enter into marriage without fully understanding the commitment and effort required to make a marriage successful. Premarital counseling provides couples with the necessary tools and knowledge to navigate the challenges that may arise in their marriage, reducing the likelihood of divorce and promoting long-term marital satisfaction.

In today’s diverse and multicultural society, premarital counseling plays a crucial role in addressing cultural differences and promoting intercultural understanding. Couples from different cultural backgrounds often face unique challenges in their relationship, such as conflicting values, traditions, and expectations. Premarital counseling helps couples to navigate these differences, fostering mutual respect and appreciation for each other’s cultural backgrounds.

Furthermore, the need for premarital counseling in the 21st century is also driven by the increasing recognition of mental health issues and their impact on relationships. Many individuals entering into marriage may have unresolved emotional or psychological issues that can significantly affect their relationship. Premarital counseling provides a platform for couples to address these issues, seek professional guidance, and develop coping strategies to ensure a healthy and fulfilling marriage.

1.3 The Purpose of the Study

The purpose of the study is to examine the Need for Premarital counseling in the 21st century. Specifically, the objectives of the study are:

1) To find out the purpose of pre-marital counseling in the 21st century.

2) To examine the beliefs and practices of Christians regarding marriage.

3) To find out the effects of pre-marital counseling on Christian marriage.

4) To examine challenges of pre-marital counseling in the 21^st Century Christian marriage.

1.4 Research Questions

1) What is the purpose of pre-marital counseling?

2) What are the beliefs and practices of Christians regarding marriage?

3) What are the effects of pre-marital counseling on Christian marriage?

4) What are the challenges of pre-marital counseling in the 21^st Century Christian marriage?

1.5 The Significance of the Study

In the 21st century, the significance of premarital counseling has become increasingly important due to the changing dynamics of relationships and marriages. With the rise in divorce rates and the challenges faced by couples in maintaining healthy and fulfilling relationships, premarital counseling offers a proactive approach to address potential issues before they become major problems.

Premarital counseling provides couples with the opportunity to explore and understand each other’s values, beliefs, and expectations. It helps them develop effective communication skills, conflict resolution strategies, and problem-solving techniques. By addressing these areas early on, couples can build a strong foundation for their relationship, increasing the likelihood of a successful and fulfilling marriage.

Another significant aspect of premarital counseling in the 21st century is its focus on addressing the unique challenges faced by couples in today’s society. With the advent of technology and social media, couples are exposed to new forms of communication and potential sources of conflict. Premarital counseling equips couples with the necessary tools to navigate these challenges and maintain a healthy balance between their virtual and real-life relationships.

The significance of premarital counseling also lies in its ability to address issues related to mental health and well-being. In the 21st century, individuals are facing increasing levels of stress, anxiety, and depression. Premarital counseling provides a safe space for couples to discuss their mental health concerns and learn coping mechanisms that can support their relationship and overall well-being.

Furthermore, premarital counseling acknowledges the importance of cultural and religious diversity in today’s society. It recognizes that couples come from different backgrounds and may have unique traditions and beliefs. By incorporating cultural sensitivity and inclusivity, premarital counseling helps couples navigate these differences and foster a deeper understanding and appreciation for each other’s heritage.

Lastly, the significance of premarital counseling in the 21st century is evident in its ability to prevent future marital issues and promote long-term relationship satisfaction. By addressing potential areas of conflict and providing couples with the necessary skills and knowledge, premarital counseling sets the stage for a healthier and more fulfilling marriage. It helps couples establish realistic expectations, develop effective communication patterns, and build a strong emotional connection, ultimately increasing the likelihood of a successful and lasting relationship.

1.6 Scope of the Study

The study examines the Need for Premarital counseling in the 21st century. The scope of the study is limited to Christ Apostolic Church Ondo-State as a case study. It is based on premarital counseling program and its benefit to the church and the intended couple.

1.7 Research Procedure

This research is historical, it is based on library work and field research. A detailed survey of the Bible, commentaries, Encyclopedia, Journal, books, internet, and dictionaries was carried out in LIFE Theological Seminary library Ikorodu, Lagos.

1.9 Definition of Terms

For the purpose of this research work, the following terms will be defined as follows:

Christian: A Christian is simply someone who follows Jesus, who calls upon Jesus Christ as his or her Lord as well as Savior (Rom. 10:9).

Christian Marriage: A Christian Marriage is when a marriage union takes place between two Bible believing Christians who truly want to serve the Lord together.

Christ Apostolic Church: The church is distinctly an indigenous African Church by its structure belief and practices; it is an independent Pentecostal church.

Counseling: It is the advice and support that is given to people to help them deal with problems, make important decisions, etc.

Effect: Is a change that results when something is done or happens: an event, condition, or state of affairs that is produced by a cause.

Marriage: Marriage is the institution whereby men and women are joined in a special kind of social and legal dependence for the purpose of finding and maintaining a family.

Premarital: Something that is occurring before Marriage

Premarital Counseling: Premarital counseling is best defined as knowledge and skills-based training procedure, which aims at providing couples with information on ways to improve their relationship once they are married.

Effect: A effect is a set of connected behaviors, rights, obligations, beliefs, and norms as conceptualized by people in a social situation

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